Right Back At Square One

Hello lovelies! This post is a personal one, but I also talk about negative body image in this post so if you find that this may affect you then please don’t read, and if you want to talk to someone please feel free to message me on any of my social media links. 

This post is almost a part 2 to another of my previous posts that you can find here. I have been skinny for most of my life, I had a fast metabolism but as I’ve got older it has slowed down, now I know that it is not the end of the world but even when I was skinny I hated the way I look, I tried my hardest to find ways to learn to love when all I needed was time, I got to my early twenties and had just started to accept my body and find ways to love it and then it started changing again. I thought I was right back at square one, I gained weight, I had rolls on my belly and I despised them. I gained stretch marks on my thighs and wanted to cover them up. I remember one night I just sat on the bathroom floor and cried because I didn’t want to start all over again, I finally got somewhere with acceptance and it had vanished before my eyes. It was all a big evil mind game.

I have tried to find ways of coping and I have found two things that work for me so far, one of them being positive affirmations and quotes, this may seem cliche but I’m not just talking about pictures on Pinterest that you make your phone wallpaper, which by the way also works a dream I’m talking about who you see on social media too, I took it upon myself to try and find people that radiate positivity, that promoted what a real body looks like and doesn’t photoshop everything to death. That way you are taking the toxic thing that doesn’t help and turning it into something positive that will help. 

Another thing that I have been doing is writing down what I am grateful for or what I loved about my body today, it can be small things like, the way my eyes looked today or my make up or my shoes that I wore made me feel confident, but it could be bigger things like, my body helped me out of a panic today. Writing down these positive words and feelings can help stop the negative things coming out, I’m not saying it will stop it right away but everyone has to start somewhere right?

I know I haven’t got many tips for loving yourself, as I’m still figuring them out, I’m still learning how to do that myself, losing the confidence I had a few years ago has broken me but it just a few steps on the ladder that has broken and I need to try and find another way up it that’s all. 

Be patient and be kind.


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